Jane Dallaway

Jane Dallaway

Jane Dallaway  //  Development manager, photographer, dog owner and snowboarder based in Brighton, UK
Email: jane @ dallaway.com
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Article: 5 Little Things That Make a BIG Difference as a Leader - Part 2: Listen Up!

This is the second part of a five part series about the little things a leader can do that could make a BIG difference in how they are perceived as leaders.

I have bad news and good news for all of you leaders and aspiring leaders.

You decide which you’d rather read first. Start with the good or jump to the bad and come back.

The Good News:

The ability to listen has been identified in study after study as one of the most important leadership skills – if not THE most important – than any other.

When you listen, you’re seen as a leader that:

 Is trustworthy

 Is patient

 Cares about others

 Is respectful

 Is compassionate

The ability to listen to employees, manager, peers, coworkers, and customers is a core, foundational skill for successful leaders. The ability to listen is key to:

 Developing and maintaining relationships

 Making good decisions

 Solving problems

Now here’s the good news:

Listening is one of the EASIEST leadership skills to learn and apply! We were born with the ability to listen. It’s a natural gift. Most people already know how to listen, and when they choose to, can do it very well.

If you want to listen, but for some reason you really don’t know how, no worries.

All you have to do is keep your mouth shut. Then, listen like the CEO is talking to you. Or like you're on a first date.

If that doesn’t work for you, then there are plenty of books, videos, courses, and blog posts with excellent, proven tips. No need to repeat them all here. With a few tips and a lot of practice, you’ll be astounded with the results.
Talk about little things that will make a BIG difference – what other skill could give a little this kind of return on investment? Give it a try. Sit back and watch your relationships improve – at work and in your personal life.

The Bad News:

Listening is one of the lowest rated leadership skills for executives. It’s an average rated skill for individual contributors and managers, then takes a nose-dive for executives. It’s one of the most common flaws I see on 360 assessments. It’s the number one reason employees think their bosses are jerks.

The botom line: poor listening is a significant contributor to executive derailment (failure).

When you fail to listen, you’re perceived as someone who:

 Is insensitive to the needs of others

 Is arrogant, impatient, or uninterested

 Is dictatorial

 Makes others feel stupid or unintelligent

 Is close-minded

Failure to listen can result in:

 Disastrous decisions

 Mistakes

 Bruised and unproductive relationships (both at work and home)

…..and eventually, if not addressed – you’ll go down in flames.

If you’re seen as a bad listener, in most cases, it’s because you’re making a CHOICE not to listen. To be blunt, you’ve gotten so full of yourself (due to your success), that you don’t have the interest or patience in what most people are saying.

If you don’t believe me, try asking for feedback. Ask the people in your life that matter to you how well you listen - and what it means to them when you don't. If this little scolding has already caused you to see the light, then go back to the good news. There’s hope for you. Good luck!

This has been in my reading pile on instapaper for a week or so but I hadn't got around to reading it yet. Then, this morning I had some appraisal training, and listening was one of the areas we covered and tried during an exercise. The exercise was enlightening, and made me appreciate just how important both listening, and choosing the right kind of question to ask, is. So I figured I'd revisit the article and read it with my newly found insight. I nodded my head a lot, so thought I'd make a note of it here for me to come back to and revisit.

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Madgex Photography Workshop #2 - my submissions

As organiser of Madgex Photography Workshop #2, I drew the (very) short straw of doing my 8 photos on the final day.  So, prior to handing the cameras in to Colourstream, I attempted my 8 shots.  As a reminder, the brief was: 

  1. a number
  2. something taken from ground level
  3. a Brighton landmark
  4. something red
  5. a dog
  6. shoes (this one is in tribute to lomokev and his fine collection of shoes and feet photographs)
  7. street art
  8. the person you're handing the camera over to

My attempts were:

A number - actually lots of numbers

Number

Something taken from ground level - these guys were jumping from surface to surface until I turned up with the camera, then the guy on the right waved at me, so I thought I'd take the photo then

From ground level

A Brighton landmark - due to limited time I chose the nearest place to my work place, the pavilion...

Brighton Landmark

Something red - probably my favourite of my photos

Red

A dog - not enough time to get home and take a photo of my lovely dog but I fortunately found one tethered outside a cafe in Bond Street

Dog

Shoes - I wasn't the only one to take a photo of the display outside this shop

Shoes

Street art

Street Art

the person you're handing the camera over to - in my case it wasn't so much a person, as a shop

Person handing the camera over to

The feedback was generally positive, people had enjoyed the challenge but had found it much more difficult than the last challenge (which allowed the use of any camera, any post processing etc). At least a couple of people appreciated the fact that it totally levelled the playing field (which was kind of the point).

Some of the participants did really well - quite a few of them got all the photos in order, and some of them managed to get a theme running through them all. The most impressive theme was books, with each photo representing a different book title - i.e. Catch 22 (for number), Brighton Rock (using the Brighton word lights from the pier (landmark) and a stick of rock) etc. The winner image(s) from the different themes are now all displayed on the notice board at work for everyone to look at and appreciate.

Madgex Photography Challenge #2 - the winners

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Madgex Photography Workshop #2

At Madgex I have the opportunity to talk to people about photography, even though it isn't related to my day job.  I occasionally run training sessions or workshops to share my passion with others.  I enjoy doing this as it makes me think in a different way - I often find explaining needs a deeper understanding than just doing.  I'm not the most talented photographer in the company, but I want to learn more, and by teaching I do just that.  In November I ran the first of a new style of workshop - this was challenge based.  It consisted of 2 parts, the first setting the scene, and issuing a challenge (in this case taking photos where the main colour of the image was one of the Madgex colours - you can see Kevin's submissions here) and the second reviewing the submissions.  Amongst the feedback from the attendees of the session was that there was too large a gap between the people who had high end cameras, and those using their iPhones or low end digital cameras, and also that those who had an aptitude for photoshop had an advantage.  When I started thinking about my 2nd workshop, and what the challenge would be I took these into account. 

Today, I issued the new challenge, this was partially inspired by this blog post which I read some point last year.  I'd bought 2 identical disposable cameras (Kodak Fun Flash 27+12 for those who want the exact details) to be shared between the 8 attendees (somewhere between 9 and 10 shots each).  I then issued them with a list of 8 items to take photographs of (inspired by lomokev's hot shots course) and as they like an element of competition, some scoring element.  

So, the photos:

  1. a number
  2. something taken from ground level
  3. a Brighton landmark
  4. something red
  5. a dog
  6. shoes (this one is in tribute to lomokev and his fine collection of shoes and feet photographs)
  7. street art
  8. the person you're handing the camera over to

And the scoring:

Basics:

  • 1 point per picture that matches the brief

Bonus Points:

  • 1 bonus points for doing them all in order
  • 2 bonus points if you can manage a theme that runs through all 8 of your images
  • 1 bonus point if your picture is judged to be the best of that category by me
  • 1 bonus point if you use only 8 exposures rather than the allowed 9

Penalty Points:

  • Lose 1 point per day you're late handing your camera over to the next person
  • Lose 1 point if the last photo of your set isn't the person you're handing over to
  • Lose 1 point per extra exposure over your allotted 9 you use
  • Lose 20 points if you break or lose the camera

The intention is to get everyone thinking more before they press the shutter, to really commit to the image they are attempting to capture.  Having been "playing with" film cameras for the past year I've begun to appreciate how much more focussed I am in what I take with film than when shooting digitally.  I also hope that this takes away the concern about equipment and allows them to focus on composition and colours rather than technicalities.  I'm really excited to see what they come up with and manage to produce, and despite the initial look of mild shock on their faces, I'm hoping that they really engage with it and enjoy this challenge.

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NVQ: Learning Styles Questionnaire

As part of my work for unit A2 I recently completed the Honey and Mumford's Learning Styles Questionnaire to determine what my learning style is.

The style that came out the strongest for me was Pragmatist, described on the questionnaire I completed as

A preference here indicates an orientation towards relevance between subject matter and one's own position. "If it works, it's good" is the motto, and they look for the earliest opportunity to implement what has been offered. They are practical, down-to-earth individuals who enjoy problem solving and making practical decisions. The focus is very strongly on implementation and output.

The sentence "They are practical, down-to-earth individuals who enjoy problem solving and making practical decisions" seems to describe me pretty well, so I guess it is in the right area. Now I just need to work out how to apply this.

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StrengthsFinder

A year ago I bought and completed the StrengthsFinder 2.0 test.

It told me that my Top 5 themes were:

  • Responsibility
  • Input
  • Learner
  • Harmony
  • Adaptability

Responsibility

The standard theme description for this is:

People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.

and my personalized strengths insights is:

Chances are good that you sometimes work hard to do things properly and ethically. Maybe you blame yourself when you fall short of your high standards. Perhaps being a solo performer frees you to work at a task until you decide it perfectly meets the specifications or aligns with your moral principles. By nature, you may wish to have a broader range of control and accountability on the job
or in your personal life. Because of your strengths, you sometimes volunteer to do things rather than wait to be asked to assume more duties. Driven by your talents, you may strive to be a dependable person. Maybe you please people by being reliable. You might enjoy assuming accountability for certain tasks, projects, assignments, or commitments. Perhaps you accept these additional duties without making a fuss. Instinctively, you are held in high regard because of your dependability and
consistent values. You are someone upon whom others often rely. Why? You do exactly what you said you would do.

Input

The standard theme description for this is:

People who are especially talented in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.

and my personalized strengths insights is:

Chances are good that you give yourself credit for reducing elaborate procedures, ideas, regulations, or systems to their fundamental parts. This explains why people ask you to tell them how things function and why other things malfunction. It’s very likely that you revel in the sensation of having
done something at a high level of excellence, such as public speaking, writing, designing, sailing, gardening, investing, selling, hunting, or yoga. Your hunger for more knowledge about a skill or a subject is customarily satisfied through reading. Undoubtedly, you integrate what you already understand with the fresh insights you glean from books, journals, correspondence, or the Internet. Instinctively, you usually give good advice. Often people's questions dictate your choice of reading
materials. Whether you are studying something for the first time or revisiting a topic to refresh your memory, you enjoy reading. Making discoveries that can help others brings you much joy. By nature, you yearn to dedicate sufficient time and energy to all the important parts of your life, such as
personal growth, professional responsibilities, family obligations, friends, health, and mental stimulation. Reading about topics that interest you or fiction that spellbinds -- that is, fascinates -- you is apt to be a factor in your quality-of-life equation. Driven by your talents, you are willing to spend some time sharing your ideas with certain individuals, especially those you perceive as especially
intelligent. Maybe you want them to tell you their latest thinking. To some extent, conversations that involve questions and answers stimulate your mind. Perhaps you decide your time was wisely spent when you have a few new ideas, theories, or concepts to somehow file away or remember for future use.

Learner

The standard theme description for this is:

People who are especially talented in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome, excites them.

and my personalized strengths insights is:

Chances are good that you may ignore distractions to concentrate on your assignments. Sometimes you keep reading, researching, experimenting, or writing until you know all you need to know about a particular subject. You might not rest until you have mastered certain concepts, committed important information to memory, or completed specific course requirements. Because of your strengths, you may prefer to be an individual performer, especially when you can direct your mental or physical
energies to tasks that intrigue you. Driven by your talents, you may be an individual performer who signs up for tough classes. Perhaps your desire to excel is amplified when the only path to a good grade is a steep one. By nature, you sometimes engage in academic pursuits for extended periods of time. You may be less inclined than some people to join a study group to absorb new information or
reinforce what you already know. Instinctively, you might offer assistance to people when the predicament in which they find themselves fascinates you. Maybe you come to the aid of others when they ask you to study an intriguing problem, unanswered question, or unfamiliar subject. Occasionally you are delighted to report back to them your discoveries and conclusions.

Harmony

The standard theme description for this is:

People who are especially talented in the Harmony theme look for consensus. They don’t enjoy conflict; rather, they seek areas of agreement.

and my personalized strengths insights is:

It’s very likely that you turn to specialists when you are searching for the best ideas. You are comfortable admitting they understand more than you do about special topics. You refuse to pretend you know everything in every situation. You avoid describing yourself as humble. You prefer to be regarded as realistic and practical. By nature, you now and then create an environment where people
can speak and be heard without interruption. Your ability to help certain individuals feel valued and respected may explain why some of them describe you as congenial, helpful, friendly, or nice. Because of your strengths, you sometimes welcome opportunities to acquire additional knowledge or new skills. From a practical perspective, ongoing education might allow you to take advantage of
experiences or engage in activities for the first time. You may want others to be informed about these training sessions. Perhaps it strikes you as unjust or elitist -- that is, snobbish -- not to make this news available to everyone. Instinctively, you may get people to like you by finding something everyone can agree on. Perhaps this is one way you reduce conflict between yourself and others. Driven by your
talents, you enjoy helping certain individuals discover what they may have in common. When people realize they are more alike than different, they may start collaborating on projects, solving problems, or sharing resources. From time to time, you are the one who makes several people aware of the way things really are. Straightforward and objective, perhaps you lay out some facts so those involved
might agree to move forward together in one direction.

Adaptability

The standard theme description for this is:

People who are especially talented in the Adaptability theme prefer to “go with the flow.” They tend to be “now” people who take things as they come and discover the future one day at a time.

and my personalized strengths insights is:

By nature, you picture yourself handling situations and issues that could arise in the coming months, years, or decades. You mentally rehearse what you plan to do in various worst-case and best-case scenarios. Your forethought prepares you to deal with whatever happens. You are a flexible person. You are not easily flustered by unexpected events, problems, or opportunities. Chances are good that
you are impelled to coordinate the many details of your life. You consciously avoid chaotic situations. Often you mentally rehearse how you will maneuver around expected and unexpected situations. First, you outline steps for reaching goals. Second, you make whatever adjustments are needed as conditions change. You rarely lose sight of what you want to accomplish in the coming months, years, or decades. Because of your strengths, you surround yourself with lovely things. These have the
power to soothe, calm, energize, and inspire you. The arts or nature itself enhances your sense of well-being. You probably pay attention to your environment because you choose to live each moment to its fullest. It’s very likely that you realize that each day offers its own surprises. You trust you can handle whatever occurs. Even when you do not know exactly what to do, you probably know someone who does. You have an uncanny ability to easily and cooperatively proceed in the direction in which other people and processes are moving. Driven by your talents, you live in a state of hope-filled expectancy. You eagerly await what will come next. You probably feel your life is a lot more interesting when you are not forced to follow set routines, rigid rules, and/or predictable plans.

As part of my NVQ work I've been asked to find this, and any other similar tests I've done to work towards module A2 - Manage your own resources and professional development. The outcomes for my StrengthFinder came with some Ideas for Action, which I must confess, I haven't even looked at between then and now and I certainly didn't produce a "Strengths-Based Action Plan". Something else for the "to do in 2010" list I suspect!

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ILP Time - How did I spend mine?

So, the first period of ILP time is over, and I've managed to use 50-60 hours of my allocation attending workshops, watching presentations, learning stuff and doing ideas project work.
Learning:

  • Started reading through the Opera web standards curriculum to ensure my knowledge was up to date
  • Attended various presentations including: Stress Management, Zen and the craft of software development, Introduction to unit testing with nUnit, CSS3: Third time's the charm, Comet (a presentation by Simon Willson who came in kindly to talk to us), Basic NLP and hypnosis, SQL Server Advanced, Vision and Goal setting, Theories of Management and Javascript inheritance


Ideas:

  • Looked into DBVerse, a database deployment tool, to see if this would help us. Review here
  • Looked into Tarantino, another database deployment tool. Review here
  • Worked with Bruce to start writing a database deployment tool to meet our specific requirements. This is still ongoing and will continue into the next few months
  • Attended Hackday 3 and worked on some keyword searching work with Chris
  • Looked into Stylecop, a code style analyser. Review here


Now I have to start planning out the next years allocation - I'm cashing in a couple of days to attend the ReMix UK conference, I'm going to continue attending Simon's management and leadership courses, as well as his NLP related ones. I'm also hosting 2 sessions in the next month - one which is SQL Snap, based on CSS Specificity snap and one which is an experimental SQL Coding dojo. I'm sure I'll report back on both of these afterwards.

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Learning

One of the Madgex value words is Passionate, and this got me to thinking what am I the most passionate about in my working life and it has to be learning. And by that I mean both learning myself and encouraging and enabling learning amongst team members and colleagues.

In Eat that frog - which I'm currently reading - there is a lovely quote

"Continuous learning is the minimum requirement for success in any field"

One of the things I try and do is read a lot, mostly in the form of blogs where I find useful titbits of information, or clues, or things to go and find out more about, but also books relating to more static skills. My google reader list now includes more leadership and time management focussed blogs as well due to my recent role change. I've also cashed in some of my ILP time to follow the Web Standards Curriculum to ensure that I have a full understanding of the implications of web standards.

This also leads to me keeping a keen eye on what is going on event-wise within the community - both locally, here in Brighton, and further afield (well near London main-line stations if I'm honest) - that could form an introduction to new techniques, technologies and methodologies. I've just started sending out a weekly email to Madgex containing all of my finds, so that others can benefit from shared learning experiences. My key resources for this are upcoming searches for Brighton & Hove, geek, .Net, Barcamp, sql, developer along with MSDN events, VBUG events and Skills Matter events.

I'm planning to go to Remix UK in September, which I'm hoping will be a great way to catch up with new technologies and new methodologies. I've been to a WebDD, a DDD and SQLBits community conferences before so it will be great to see how Remix differs.

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